When will I feel alone?
Answer: When all that was, now is no more. When this life is alien to me: when the colours aren’t clear anymore, when the telephone lines are cut, and my destination -it, matters no more to me, then the journey is irrelevant.
Answer: It will be when life doesn’t matter to me, when the order of things ceases to be important, when the reasons I valued, have just evaporated in the sun. That is when I will truly be alone.
Answer: It will be when my thoughts cry silently behind my eyes – which long for sights that again will never be.
I shall be a lost time traveller wondering this strange world that I can not relate to.
Answer: It will be when I hunger for the food that is extinct, that calmed me down in past times.
That is when my world will start to fall apart. That is when my life and desire will cease to be meaningful.
Perhaps death will calm me.
These days will be a drowning suffocation, a mindless wonder, a frightful time, an uneasy existence of uncertainty, and I will be without, empty and undefined – Truly without – like death separates an ageing couple – I will loose my identity and without an identity, what purpose is there to exist…
Perhaps death will calm me, for I know no better.
Perhaps death will calm me.